“Lotus Love” Part III- A Foot in Both Worlds; Chapter 19- Seattle & Brooklyn: Coming to America

Part III- A Foot in Both Worlds

Chapter 19- Seattle & Brooklyn: Coming to America

Just before dawn, Jennifer heard a car pull down the alley in front of their building.  She looked out the window and recognized the shape of the white Indian taxi cab.  “Tsering-la, our taxi’s here!  Oh my gosh– can you believe it?!  Your trip to America is beginning!”

“Urgyen Rinpoche!” Tsering exclaimed quietly under his breath a quick and urgent prayer to Guru Rinpoche that Tibetans often say in times of worry, surprise, distress, or fear.  Tsering and Jennifer gathered up their things and carried their luggage down the three flights of stairs into the dark alley where the driver was waiting for them.  They put their luggage in the trunk and got into the cab.  While pulling out of the alley, Jennifer checked her backpack one last time to make sure she had all the essentials– passports, airplane tickets, and the last of their cash– just over a thousand rupees.  It was all there.  They had everything needed to ensure a smooth passage from India to America.

Tsering had suggested they buy a Tibetan-style thermos to bring on their trip.  He filled it with Boja, hot Tibetan butter tea, just before the taxi arrived and had a bag full of balep, Tibetan pan-fried bread, and chura, dried Tibetan cheese,  for snacking.  Jennifer had tried to persuade Tsering not to bring the thermos and food along on the trip.  She thought it would just inconvenience them.  Tsering, however  could not imagine making such a long journey without carrying provisions and insisted.

Once they arrived at the airport, they went to check-in.  It turned out their large army-sized duffel bag that was full of merchandise was overweight.  With some clever repacking and shuffling of items into other bags, they had just enough rupees left over after paying the cab to cover the cost of freight.  With no cash left in their pockets, Jennifer was suddenly grateful for Tsering’s thermos full of Boja and bag full of balep.  Her stomach was grumbling after the long cab ride and drama with the luggage.  With boarding passes in hand, it was time to pass through security.  Jennifer breezed right through but Tsering was held for questioning.  The Indian security guard had doubts about the validity of his travel documents.  His passport was not a standard but a specially-issued one for Tibetan Refugees.  This particular policeman had apparently never come across one before.  Jennifer tried to explain Tsering’s situation to the officer but he was convinced that Tsering’s passport was a fake.  He called over a superior who luckily had experience with Tibetan Refugee travel documents.  Tsering was eventually allowed to pass through to the boarding area.  Jennifer led the way to their gate where they sat down to drink tea and eat balep.  Soon enough, their flight was called and they boarded their plane, thermos and all.

Now that they were safe and sound on their first flight, Jennifer let out a deep sigh of relief and rested her head on Tsering’s shoulder.  The adrenaline from the anticipation of the journey was wearing off and fatigue from staying awake all night was hitting hard.  The young couple was fast asleep before the plane even took off.  They slept through almost the entire flight, waking just before the plane started its descent into Icheon Airport in Seoul, Korea.  Their lay-over was just a few hours long and once again Jennifer was grateful for the thermos of Boja that was incredibly still warm.  They sat in the gate’s lounge area waiting for their second and final flight to Seattle, sipping Boja and getting giddy about Tsering’s imminent arrival in the States.  There were some other Americans also waiting to board their flight and Jennifer joined them in conversation.  She hadn’t spoken with any Americans other than the Consulars at the Embassy since she had arrived back in India over a month earlier.  She introduced Tsering to them and shared how he was about to immigrate to the US.  Everyone was very excited for him, wishing Tsering good luck on his maiden voyage to America.  In the midst of their celebratory chatter, they heard their flight being called for final boarding.  Somehow they had all missed the initial boarding calls.  In a rush, they gathered their things and headed to the gate with their boarding passes.

Jennifer and Tsering boarded the plane and found their seats.  Just as Tsering was putting their bag of provisions in the overhead compartment, Jennifer realized that she did not have her carry-on bag with her.  “My backpack! Tsering do you have my backpack?!”  Tsering looked back at her with a confused expression.  Jennifer had always taken responsibility for her own backpack before and never forgotten it since he’d known her.  This was really out of character for her.  While rushing to the gate moments ago, she must have forgotten it in the terminal where they were conversing with the other Americans.  She jumped up and moved as fast as she could down the aisle back to the door of the plane.  It had already been closed.  She found a flight attendant and pleaded, “Please, you have to let me deboard!  I left my bag in the waiting area!  It has our passports and my husband’s immigration visa in it!  If the bag is where I think I left it, I won’t be but a minute!”

“All right.  We’ll open the door and let you go get it.  I’ll call attendant at the gate and ask them to open the door for you.  But if you’re not back in two minutes, we’re going to have to leave without you.”

“I promise– I’ll be right back.”  Jennifer started to panic as she ran back up the boarding ramp to the terminal.  “What if her bag was gone?  What if someone stole it?  What if their passports and Tsering’s immigration visa were gone?”  Her mind and heart were racing as she approached the door that was being held open by a flight attendant.  She ran past him and headed straight to the window where she had been sitting on a ledge before they realized their flight was in its final boarding phases.  Thankfully, her black leather Coach backpack was still there, right where she had left it.  She undid the brass buckle and lifted the flap to check that their precious contents were still inside.  It all was there.  Jennifer silently thanked the Three Jewels for her good luck.  This could have had a much different outcome.  She quickly ran back to the gate and thanked the attendant for holding the door for her.  She ran down the ramp and back onto the plane, making eye contact with Tsering as she turned down their aisle and giving him a reassuring smile that all was fine.

“Can you imagine, Tsering?” she said, taking her seat and fastening her seatbelt.  “That was so close!  What if I had not realized I’d left the bag back in the terminal until after the plane took off?!  Or what if someone had stolen it?!  We would have lost everything!  I can’t believe I did that.  It’s so unlike me.  I must be really tired or too excited.  I’m sorry.”

“No worry, Jenni.  It was scary, yes.  I see you leave the airplane and I don’t know if you coming back!  I so happy when you come on airplane again and I see you!  I don’t want to go America by myself!” Tsering explained that he had a bit of scare of his own, too.  Jennifer kept the backpack under the seat in front of her where she could see it.  She wasn’t going to take any chances by leaving it in the overhead compartment.  For the length of the flight across the Pacific Ocean, Tsering and Jennifer watched movies and chatted about Tsering’s first meeting with his new American family members.  Jennifer’s sister Anne and her father were planning to meet them at the airport.

When the flight arrived at Seattle-Tacoma International Airport, Tsering and Jennifer passed through immigration and customs.  Jennifer was nervous– she was worried that there might be some kind of obstacle or snafu with Tsering’s immigration visa.  Everything had been such hard work up until now, she was accustomed to challenges presenting themselves along the way.  However, not moments after Tsering presented his yellow Indian International Certificate with his American Immigration visa affixed inside, he was issued a temporary Green Card and Social Security Number.  “Welcome to America,” the Immigration Officer said as he handed Tsering his American documents.  “Your permanent Green Card will be sent in the mail.  But with this temporary one and your social security number, you are legal to reside and work in the United States starting today.  Good luck.”  Tsering and Jennifer were both surprised by the efficiency and ease with which Tsering passed through immigration.  As they crossed past the red line into the baggage claim area it was official.  Tsering was in America!  They found their luggage and passed through Customs.  The oversize army duffel was inspected by a Customs Officer who was curious about all the merchandise inside.  Jennifer explained that they had been living in India the past six months and that Tsering had just immigrated to the US.  She explained that they had a ton of gifts for her family members and souvenirs for Tsering to remember his life back home.  The Officer zipped the bag back up and let them pass.

Jennifer and Tsering gathered their things and passed through sliding doors out into the terminal where family members and friends were anxiously awaiting the arrival of passengers as they exited Customs.  Jennifer scanned the crowd and spotted her sister and father who was holding a helium balloon decorated with the American flag.  She waved to them and caught their attention.  Huge smiles were followed by warm hugs as Anne and Walt showered affection on both Jennifer and Tsering equally.  Tsering had never received a greeting in this fashion before and was a bit overwhelmed by it.  He was going to have to get used to public displays of affection, in particular the American custom of hugging.  However, he could not help but feel the sincere love and warm intent behind these strange gestures and was instantly relieved by their warm welcome.  Jennifer could tell that her father was truly sincere in extending his welcome to Tsering.  He immediately took to him, engaging Tsering in conversation and listening patiently to his nervous responses.  Jennifer was glad they had chosen to come to Seattle.

Back at her sister’s home, the family shared a meal together while everyone gave Tsering their full interest and attention.  They were so curious to get to know their new Tibetan family member.   They wanted to know about his family back home in Tibet, what life was like growing up in the Himalayan mountains, and what his previous life was like as a monk.  Anne’s husband, Brad, a passionate mountain climber, was especially interested in Tsering’s experiences in the mountains as a young yak farmer.  Tsering had plenty to talk about and a lot of English to learn in order to express himself.  He felt comfortable with his new family and appreciated their warm welcome and sincere interest in his very different background and culture.  At the end of the evening, Anne brought them downstairs into the basement of her home where she graciously offered them the use of a small apartment for as long as they needed.  Jennifer and Tsering thanked her and then collapsed on the large queen-sized bed that was covered in fresh linens and soft pillows.  Tsering and Jennifer had never shared such a luxurious bed before.  Back in India they were used to sleeping on simple wooden twin bed frames with thin mattresses.  They slept sweetly and soundly in their new digs despite their jetlag and the nine hour time change.

The next few weeks were spent in relaxed harmony with Anne, Brad and their adorable two year old son, Sal.  Sal was the first and only grandchild in the family at the time.  He had a head of bright read hair, just like his adoring mother and two doting aunties.  Sal was a special child.  He had a difficult passage into this life and the fact that he survived the first week after birth was a miracle.  After months of therapies and testing, the doctors were unable to give a clear diagnosis to baby Sal’s condition, but it was clear he had many challenges ahead of him. Despite the doctors’ vague and pessimistic prognosis, however, little Sal proved them wrong time after time, surpassing benchmarks and expectations for what they thought his little body would be able to do.  Down the road, it was discovered that baby Sal had been born without a fully developed corpus callosum, the part of the brain that connects the right and left hemispheres.  Without this vital part of the brain working correctly, Sal’s body had multiple central line disorders.  As an infant he did not have a natural sucking mechanism so was unable to nurse or drink from a bottle.  He was fed through a feeding tube that passed from his nose, down his throat and into his stomach.  Later on, as a toddler he had a surgery that installed a g-tube directly into his stomach.  Later it became evident that Sal was cognitively delayed as well and was given the autistic label by the specialists.  Despite all the challenges, though, Sal’s arrival in the family had a palpable healing effect on the entire family.  He brought out the best in everyone and increased the family’s capacity for compassion and presence.

Tsering was especially fond of little Sal.  He and Jennifer often babysat him while Anne ran errands or took advantage of their presence in her home to go out on dates with her husband Brad.  They used the baby backpack to take him on walks around the lovely Greenlake neighborhood of Seattle and picked up all sorts of child care skills from their time spent with him.  Since Jennifer and Tsering were both the “Chung-was” or babies of their families, they didn’t have much previous experience with child-rearing.  So in this regard, baby Sal was their first teacher in parenting.

Jennifer and Tsering also had fun in Anne’s kitchen.  Tsering marveled at all the automated machines in Anne’s home– the refrigerator, the oven, the dishwasher, the microwave, the vacuum, the washer and dryer.  He had never seen any of these modern appliances before back home in rural Tibet or as a monk in India and was very impressed with the convenience they offered.  Tsering and Jennifer enjoyed preparing Tibetan meals for the family, introducing them all to the gastronomic delight known as the momo.  With rave reviews of their Tibetan meals, Tsering and Jennifer entertained the idea of opening a Tibetan restaurant.  When they weren’t cooking at home, Jennifer had fun introducing Tsering to the multicultural foods of American restaurants.  The first stop was to Red Mill Burgers– an award-winning gourmet hamburger joint in Seattle.  It was Tsering’s first-ever hamburger experience.  Jennifer ordered him a cheeseburger with grilled onions and mushrooms, french fries and a chocolate milkshake.  Just one bite and he was in love.

On their way back from the Red Mill, Jennifer remembered that there was a small Tibetan gift shop in the same neighborhood and decided to stop by to see if it was open.  They found the storefront and were glad to see that the shop door was open.  The shop was called Pema Karpo and the owner, Rigdzin was there.  He remembered Jennifer from before, she had been in a couple of times during previous visits to her family in Seattle.  Tsering was excited to meet another Tibetan and seized the opportunity to speak his language.  Rigdzin was very hospitable and suggested that he close the shop– it was a slow day he claimed– so he could take them for a visit to the shore together.  He exited through a Tibetan door curtain and went into the back room of the shop where his three year old daughter was watching television.  Moments later he came out with her and asked if Jennifer and Tsering had a car.  They said they did so he suggested they follow him to the the beach.  They spent the rest of the daylight into the early evening playing with little Pema in the sand while Rigdzin and Tsering shared their stories.  Jennifer was very happy that Tsering was able to connect with another Tibetan so soon here in the States.  It turned out that Rigdzin also married an “Inji” or westerner.  His wife was a school teacher and the family was active with the local Sakya Tibetan Buddhist monastery.

Rigdzin suggested they visit the temple with him.  The temple was on their way home to their sister’s house so they agreed.  An evening meditation practice was going on when they arrived and after making three prostrations to the beautiful, large, golden Buddha statue at the center of the shrine, they took seats at the back of the temple and joined in the prayers.   Jennifer had visited a couple of years previously with the Khenpo brothers.  The Rinpoches were visiting Seattle on a teaching tour and stayed at Jennifer’s step-mother and father’s home.  Jennifer flew out to Seattle to be able to spend precious time with the Lamas during their stay.  While visiting the Sakya temple with the Rinpoches, Jennifer learned that the monastery was featured in Bernardo Bertolucci’s film “Little Buddha.”  At the end of the puja, Jennifer and Tsering thanked Rigdzin for a wonderful time together and promised to visit him again at the store.

When Jennifer and Tsering were not spending time with the family, cooking, or babysitting Sal, they stayed in their basement apartment studying, praying and meditating.  Tsering started to work on a tangkha as well.  He wanted to offer a painting of Guru Rinpoche to Jennifer.  He worked on it for several hours everyday.  By the end of their stay in Seattle at the end of one month, the painting was complete.  It was stunning.  Tsering had purchased most of the supplies at a local art supply store in Seattle.  However, he was not satisfied with the selection of paint brushes available for sale.  He said they were not fine enough for the very thin lines that he intended to paint.  He ended up making a paintbrush himself using a few hairs pulled from the tail of Anne’s cat.

Although Jennifer and Tsering spent an idyllic month in Seattle, Jennifer was feeling a pull back to the East Coast.  She missed her Teachers as well as friends and family back in New York.  Tsering was also curious to explore different parts of the country and was especially interested in visiting New York City.  Her sister tried to convince Jennifer and Tsering to stay longer in Seattle and consider settling down there, but the young couple were not ready to make any decisions, yet.  They thanked their sister and brother-in-law for their loving welcome into their home and told them they would be back soon to visit.

Once again Jennifer and Tsering packed up their belongings.  Jennifer’s father and sister dropped them off at the airport the morning of their flight.  They flew to New York City’s La Guardia airport where Jennifer’s grandfather was anxiously waiting to greet his granddaughter and meet her Tibetan husband.  He had graciously offered the young couple the use of his home while they were finding their bearings.  He missed Jennifer while she was away– he had gotten used to her presence the past couple of years she spent living with him.  Despite the fact that he was not completely thrilled to open his house to Jennifer’s husband, a complete stranger to him at this point in time, he was willing to compromise in exchange for some much longed for company.  Jennifer was a little nervous about how the two men were going to get along.  Her grandfather could be unpredictable.  But from the moment Jennifer introduced Tsering to her grandfather outside the terminal on the curb beside her grandpa’s cherry red Caddy, everything went smoothly.  Her grandfather was kind and welcoming to Tsering, and not just in a polite way, but sincerely.  Jennifer remembered that her grandfather identified with Tsering having been an immigrant to the United States himself as a young boy.

They stayed with Jennifer’s grandfather in his Westchester home for two weeks, driving Jennifer’s car or riding the train into the City.  They spent the first few days like tourists– Jennifer brought Tsering to the top of the Empire State Building, to the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the New York Library, and Central Park.  They also visited Jackson Heights, the Indian neighborhood in Queens, where many Tibetans were living to eat at the Indian and Tibetan restaurants.  When they weren’t in the City, they spent time with Jennifer’s grandfather, cooking dinner for him or going for walks by the shore with him.  One day at the shore, Jennifer’s grandfather and Tsering got into an interesting conversation while sitting down on a bench for a short rest.  Jennifer’s grandfather was looking out to the horizon across the water when Tsering said, “You believe the earth is flat or round?”

Jennifer’s grandfather didn’t think he heard the question correctly and responded, “What did you say?  Speak up, I can’t hear you.”

Tsering repeated, “Do you think the earth is flat or round?”

“What kind of crazy question is that?!” the old man replied, frustrated that he had understood the question correctly in the first place and confused by what he viewed as a stupid question.  “Don’t you know that the earth is round?  I thought you were educated!  Jennifer told me you studied for years as a monk.  Didn’t they teach you that the earth is round?  People used to think it was flat, but that was over five hundred years ago.”

Tsering laughed and responded, “Really?  You mean at the end of the ocean the world does not come to an end?  How do you know?”

Jennifer’s Grandfather answered, “I know because there is proof.  Here is a simple way that you can see it with your own eyes.  If you look out to the horizon, you can see a boat very far out to sea.  Right now you can see the entire boat.  But if it keeps going further out, past the horizon, the boat will slowly disappear.  However, you will still be able to see the mast and the sail.  Eventually even the sail will disappear and finally, the mast.”  Jennifer could see that Tsering was not following the nautical terminology and explained to Tsering the meaning of the words mast and sail.

“Oh, now I got you.  Yes, that is a very good proof.  Thank you for showing me.”  Tsering liked the scientific way in which Jennifer’s grandfather explained this concept to him.

“Welcome to the twentieth century, young man!” the old man replied as he gave Tsering an affectionate smack on the back.

Although Jennifer and Tsering enjoyed spending time with her grandpa, they were feeling the urge to find their own place.  They missed the privacy they enjoyed back in India.  Jennifer decided it was time to find a job and start searching for an apartment.  She had several friends living in Brooklyn in the Park Slope neighborhood.  She really liked this neighborhood but unfortunately, the rents were a bit out of their budget.  Jennifer found a job very quickly at a brand-new restaurant in Midtown Manhattan called Tao.  It was opening in just a few days time and she was hired to be a server.  The restaurant was huge with an enormous 3-story statue of the Buddha at the center of the warehouse-sized space.  The menu offered 3 different types of high-end Asian cuisine– Japanese, Chinese and Thai.  Jennifer was hired for her previous waiting experience at both Thai and Japanese restaurants in Vermont.  The job was going to be fast-paced and challenging, but promised a good income in tips.  Jennifer was also planning on getting back into auditions for stage and film.  This restaurant would be a good place for networking.  Once she secured a job, Jennifer’s grandfather generously offered to loan them the money they needed to secure a place.  They were going to need 3 times the amount of one month’s rent as most landlords required first and last month’s rent plus a security deposit in order to secure a lease.  They eventually found a 900 square foot studio apartment in a modest middle class neighborhood called Kensington on Ocean Parkway.  It was just a few blocks from the Southwest entrance to Prospect Park and just one block from the F train.  They would be able to take walks in the park or ride bikes down to the beach and boardwalk at Coney Island.  Their apartment was on the sixth floor, but the building had an elevator.  The studio featured a beautiful parquet floor and lots of light.  Compared to their living conditions in India, this place felt like a palace.

Jennifer and Tsering settled into their first place together Stateside.  Jennifer’s Mom and Stepdad drove down from Gloucester with some furniture for them to use.  Jennifer’s Uncle Bill also donated some furniture that had been sitting unused in the basement of Jennifer’s grandfather’s home.  The night they moved in, Tsering saw an old sofa sitting in the lobby of their building.  It had a sign on that said “free.”  After inspecting it and finding no major flaws, Tsering could not believe that someone would just give away a perfectly good piece of furniture.  He found it very odd indeed.  But he was more than happy to take advantage of someone else’s poor judgement and asked Jennifer to help him haul it up the six flight of stairs.  Jennifer wasn’t as excited about the old sofa as Tsering, but she agreed to adopt it because they needed one.  The fabric was a bit worn in spots, but they could easily throw a large blanket over it to cover it up.

Once all their hand-me-down furnishings were moved in, they had quite a comfortable little home.  Their bed was a futon that Jennifer had inherited from a friend during her college years in Burlington, Vermont.  Their dresser came from her Mother’s childhood room.  Jennifer had enough clothes to fill the top three drawers and Tsering had just enough clothing to his name to fill the bottom drawer.  Their dining table originally came from the kitchen of Jennifer’s childhood home.  Her mother donated them a wicker shelf and a glass coffee table.  Jennifer’s sisters generously offered the young couple a Crate & Barrel gift certificate as a house-warming gift so they could purchase items for their kitchen.

Jennifer started working her new job, commuting into Manhattan mid-afternoon on the subway while Tsering stayed home in the safety of their apartment.  He was not yet confident enough with his English reading skills to venture out into the streets or subway system where he might get lost and not be able to read a map or signs in order to find his way back.  While Jennifer was working at the restaurant, he studied and painted.  One of Anne’s friends back in Seattle had commissioned Tsering to paint a Medicine Buddha tangkha for his shrine room.  Jennifer’s dinner shift did not end until the early hours of the morning.  It turned out Tao was not just a restaurant but a hot new bar/night spot as well.  The opening week was crazy.  The place was packed, with every table on all three floors filled for the entire eight hour shift.  Jennifer’s station was on the top floor, so she had to go up and down two flights of stairs to access the basement kitchen and the bar on the first level.  It was definitely a work-out.  By the end of the night she was exhausted.  She also did not feel comfortable in the nightclub atmosphere, especially with the sacred image of the Buddha and the photos of monks and nuns on the walls.  She felt like her spiritual tradition was being disrespected and commodified.  One of the other waitresses who shared her station was from Mongolia.  Also a Buddhist, she felt ashamed by the disrespectful conduct of the clientele that worsened as the evening wore on.  Post midnight, when the kitchen closed, the restaurant became a night club.  Drinking, drugging and suggestive dancing were in full effect, right in front of the Buddha statue, until closing at 2 AM.

By the time Jennifer had closed out her station, found a cab for the ride back to Brooklyn– not an easy task at 3 AM in Manhattan– and driven back to the apartment, it was nearly 4 AM.  Hoping to roll into a warm bed and welcoming arms, Jennifer was surprised to find the lights on and a distraught Tsering pacing back and forth down the length of their studio.  “Tsering-la, you’re still awake?  It’s so late.  Why aren’t you sleeping?”

“Where have you been?!  Why you coming home so late?! I am waiting you all night!” Tsering was livid.  Jennifer had never seen him like this before.

“I’m sorry I’m so late, Tsering-la.  Please don’t be angry.  I had no idea that my shift would end so late.  The kitchen didn’t close until midnight and then we were expected to continue serving drinks until 2 AM.  By the time the place finally closed and I cleaned my station, it was 3.  I’m exhausted.  You have no idea how many flights of stairs I climbed up and down tonight.  But the good news is I made three hundred dollars in tips.”

“I don’t care how much money you make.  You out in the middle of the night is crazy!  This crazy!  What kind of job is this?!”

“I know.  It is crazy.  I had no idea it was a nightclub, too.  I don’t like it either.  I hate the mindless behavior of the customers in the plain site of the Buddha.  It was disgusting,” Jennifer agreed.  Tsering went to their shrine which sat on top of their dresser and took the small bronze Buddha statue in his hand.  He walked over to Jennifer and placed it on her head.

“Promise you not go back there again, Jenni.  For me.  I your husband and I can’t live like this.  You find better job, in day time.”

“Yes, Tsering, I promise.  I’ll quit.  You’re right, I can find a better job with better hours.  I don’t think I could keep up the stamina required for climbing those stairs, anyway.  But I’ll have to go back in tomorrow to pick-up my paycheck and tell them in person.  But I won’t stay for the shift,  I promise.  Kun Chok Sum,” Jennifer swore by witness of the Three Jewels.

Satisfied with her resolve, Tsering returned the Buddha statue to its central place on the shrine and the two finally went to bed just before dawn.  It was their first quarrel.  Jennifer was relieved that they were able to resolve the situation rather quickly and she was glad that Tsering had pushed her to quit the job.  Due to her work ethic, she probably would have kept working there despite her moral disapproval of the clientele’s conduct.  Jennifer often had a hard time setting boundaries for herself and also had a difficult time saying no out of fear of disappointing others.  But now that she had promised Tsering and sworn by the Three Jewels, she had to quit.

The management and staff were all surprised to hear her resignation, especially after such a financially successful opening.  The VIP Sky Box was reserved for the New York Knicks that evening and P-Diddy was going to be having a private birthday bash later that month.  Everyone wondered why she would walk away from such an opportunity.  But as Jennifer left, she had no regrets.  At the suggestion of her father, Jennifer contacted her Uncle Patrick who owned a five-star restaurant in Lower Manhattan in the Financial District.  He invited her in for an interview the next day.  Her uncle suggested that she bring Tsering with him as well so that he could not only meet him, but so that he could consider him for a job as well.  Patrick owned two restaurants in the World Financial Center complex, both with stunning views of the Hudson River, the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island.  The restaurant on the upper level was called The Hudson River Club and was well-known for its gourmet cuisine which specialized in local, seasonal offerings of the Hudson River region.  Downstairs was a more casual Irish pub called Moran’s.  Both establishments were popular and busy, catering to the stock brokers and investment firms that worked in the complex.  The older generation frequented the upstairs dining room for business lunches while the younger generation took advantage of the happy hour deals downstairs.

Jennifer’s Uncle kindly offered her and Tsering both jobs.  Jennifer would work a full forty-hour week pieced together with a combination of serving, coat checking and banquets.  Tsering would work part-time as banquet staff.  Jennifer was grateful to her Uncle’s generosity and they started work immediately.  Together they were able to bring in enough money to pay their bills.  Jennifer enjoyed her time in the coat check closet most, where she was removed from the high-stress atmosphere of the dining room.  She brought her laptop to work with her on these days where she could easily multi-task her coat-checking duties with writing and researching a business plan.  She and Tsering were still dreaming of opening a Tibetan restaurant together and had decided to make a go of it in Brooklyn.  Every time an investment banker handed over his overcoat to Jennifer, he would notice her busily typing away on a laptop.  Curious to learn what a coat-check girl could be occupied with, he would inquire about her activity and Jennifer would end up discussing her business plan with him.  She ended up getting not only great business advice from them but often a generous twenty dollar bill in the tip jar as well.

Jennifer and Tsering spent that year commuting into Battery Park to work their shifts.  Every time Jennifer took the subway into the World Trade Center, she had a foreboding feeling in her gut.  She did not like the overwhelming sense of power, wealth, and entitlement that seemed to permeate the very architecture of this epicenter of world finance.  She felt like there was something rotten at the very core of it all.  As she passed through the enclosed overhead crosswalk that joined the Trade Center Towers to the Financial Center buildings, she had an ominous feeling of bad things to come.  She remembered the bombing that had taken place in one of the Towers just a few years back and sensed the negative energy still lingered.  She hoped that she and Tsering would soon find financing to get their new business venture off the ground so that she could stop coming to this corrupt place.

After a few months of work under their belts, Tsering and Jennifer decided to take a vacation.  The Florida Sangha was hosting their annual winter retreat in Palm Beach and the Rinpoches would be offering daily Dharma teachings, meditation and prayer sessions.  Jennifer’s grandfather owned a condo apartment in Palm Beach right on the ocean.  He generously offered the use of his condo to all his family members, especially now that he was not motivated to use it himself in his older years.  Jennifer arranged for her shifts to be covered at the restaurant and they flew down to the land of the Snow Birds to enjoy the precious turning of the Dharma Wheel and the warmth of the Florida sun.

Tsering had not seen the Rinpoches for almost a year.  So much had transpired since his path crossed with Jennifer in Sarnath.  Being in the presence of the Rinpoches and the sacred Dharma was healing and comforting for him.  Yet simultaneously, because he had suppressed so many emotions about being an ex-monk, it brought up discomfort for him as well.  He was going to have to navigate a new spiritual path for himself, one without the red and saffron robes and shaved head of a monk.  He was a layperson now, a householder.  At the same time he was still learning English and the American culture.  He struggled to find himself in this new world.  However, the American sangha members were all very welcoming and supportive to Tsering, curious to learn about him and all he had to offer their community.

In the middle of the week, the Rinpoches invited Tsering and Jennifer to their home in Lake Worth.  They enjoyed tea together in the afternoon and the Lamas enjoyed spending time with Tsering, speaking their shared regional Riwoche dialect of Tibetan and sharing stories about their homeland together.  This reunion was especially healing for Tsering.  After tea, the Rinpoches told Tsering and Jennifer that they could go receive blessings from their father, Lama Chimed Namgyal.  Lama Chimed was in his late eighties and his health had been failing in the past year.  Jennifer was extremely honored for the opportunity to be in his presence.  She was very grateful that Tsering would have the opportunity to meet this great hidden yogi for the first time.

When they entered Lama Chimed’s room, he was sitting on the floor,  as he was apt to do, at the foot of his bed.  He was peacefully abiding in meditation.  The young couple immediately made three prostrations in reverance to this precious teacher and then offered him khatags which he then wrapped around their necks while reciting mantras and prayers to Guru Rinpoche over them as a blessing.  Lama-la then asked them to be seated with him and he engaged Tsering in conversation.  Lama Chimed did not speak English, but he didn’t need to.  His very life and actions went beyond words and were deep teachings in and of themselves.  Lama-la was a Dzogchen master– he had devoted his entire life to contemplation, meditation and prayer.  Just to be in his presence was empowering and purifying.  The entire sangha was extremely devoted to and fond of Lama-la.

Jennifer listened to Lama Chimed and Tsering’s conversation, picking up bits and pieces of their shared Khampa dialect.  Then Lama-la’s attention turned to Jennifer and with a huge smile on his face he said, “Jenni, yakpo re, yakpo re.  Lama America yong gyu pe yakpo re!”  Jennifer didn’t quite understand what Lama was trying to communicate to her other than whatever it was, it was good and pleased him.  She looked to Tsering to translate for her.   He told her that Lama Chimed said he thought it was very good that Jennifer had brought Tsering to America with her.

Lama Chimed laughed and smiled at Jennifer, repeating again in a sing-song kind of way, “Yakpo re, yakpo re, Lama America yong gyu pe yakpo re!”  These words brought so much joy to Jennifer’s heart.  She was still a bit anxious about the choice she and Tsering had made and these affirming words had such a healing effect on her heart.  It was as if Lama knew the inner doubts of this young couple who had taken such a bold leap of faith, crossing cultural taboos on both their parts, to let the truth of their love be known.  On the small puja table that sat in front of Lama was an egg which he picked up and handed to Jennifer with a loving gaze.  Just then, Lama’s eldest son, Khenchen Rinpoche, came into the room to tell his father it was time for the guests to leave so he could rest.  Jennifer and Tsering thanked Lama Chimed for his precious blessings and walked out of the room with their heads bowed in reverence in his direction.  They did not know at the time that would be their final encounter with Lama-la in his current lifetime.

Tsering and Jennifer enjoyed the rest of the week in retreat and the glorious winter weather of the tropics at the beach.  They returned to their studio in Brooklyn at the end of the vacation recharged and renewed.  They returned to their routines of work and study.  Tsering signed up for a free English and citizenship class at the nearby Brooklyn College campus.  They often drove up North to Padma Samye Ling, the Rinpoches’ retreat center in Upstate New York, on the weekends to help with the various painting and building projects that were going on as the interior of the new monastery was being completed.

They celebrated Losar, the Tibetan New Year with the sangha to welcome in the Tibetan Year of the Iron Snake.  Their celebration was sombered shortly after when they heard the news that their beloved Lama Chimed had passed into mahaparinirvana on the 11th day of the 1st month of the New Year.  Lama had shown signs of great accomplishment in his passing– he remained in meditation posture for several days after his transition, his complexion glowed and the lines from his face disappeared.  After 3 days his body was still warm and flexible when it was brought to the crematory.  After the cremation, the Rinpoches found relics in the ashes, further signs that Lama was a realized being who had passed into the Dharmakaya state.  The international sangha spent the 49 days following his passing in traditional ceremonies and prayer in honor of Lama Chimed’s noble life.  Jennifer and Tsering joined the Khenpo Rinpoches in prayer at their home at Padma Samye Ling where they maintained an all-day Vajrasattva prayer vigil while the Rinpoches conducted the Peaceful and Wrathful Buddha Sadhana as well as the Amitabha Sadhana.  Jennifer and Tsering were both honored to be invited to participate in the ceremony with their Teachers in such an intimate way during this potent time.